Forming a healthy relationship is a major part of life. Being happily married or in a stable relationship has a great impact on mental health. Having a partner that understand the importance of your mental well-being, can be a blessing. A positive support system is necessary if you are struggling with mental health issues. But on the contrary, a dysfunctional relationship may add to your misery at the same time.
Often times, we tend to get all defensive & start to point fingers at our partner during conflict. This generates the sense of mistrust, distancing & hardening of our hearts which can lead to a dysfunctional relationship. It’s always easier to put blame on the other party when a dispute occurs, this self-protective
Signs of blame games in a relationship may include:
· Dispute ends in being resentful or bitter towards each other.
· Other than letting go of issues, you hold grudges against your partner & look for situations to get back at him/her.
· You do not communicate & set boundaries on behaviors that hurt you.
· You hold your partner responsible for everything without analyzing your actions first & judge his character when conflict arises instead of assertively solving issues.
In brief, in an unfortunate event if your first thought is to blame your partner rather than seeking mutual understanding & solution, you’re playing the blame game in your relationship. This type of destructive conflict resolution method allows people to avoid their own responsibility & justify their negative actions. Every relationship has their ups & downs, conflicts & differences come as a part of it. But when you let it hamper the peace of mind with vindictive choices rather than taking accountability of your actions & resolving issues, it may increase the risk of depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation, while positive interactions will reduce the risk of these issues. You might avoid conflict because you do not want it to end in a bitter dispute but the key to thriving in a relationship is coming to a mutual form of communication, where your partner can be your best support while dealing with your own mental health issues. Instead of focusing all our attention on our partner's flaws, it's important to look at our own limitations. It’s necessary to distinguish between petty issues & major conflicts as well as realizing that it’s not necessary to win every argument.
If you wish to come out of the blame game in your relationship but aren’t being able to do so by yourself, couples counselling can be a solution. It will help you identify the defensive patterns of your communication, move past the mistrust among partners and create moments with deeper connection. In this way you can learn how to suppress the inner critic voice inside you while you are in an argument & form a far meaningful, long-lasting relationship.
0 Comments